Remember that Namaste dude that would post his lofty buddha jewels of wisdom in my direction in the comments section? I got tired of his shit and zorched him from the blog so he went over to my youtube channel and started in over there. By the way he claims to be a monk on a mountaintop in Thailand, but tracing his ISP yields a dallas tx address – go figure…

So I zapped him there and the same type of comments keep showing up under other you tube users’ names. They all have some “loser” theme to them and I gotta wonder what a fulfilling life one must have to spend the time creating accounts to post inflammatory comments on a youtube of me building a rocket stove. Click delete, block user etc and on my merry way. But I got to thinking and came up with this. So here’s to you namaste or whomever it is that feels the need to be greater than me:

<rant>Yep, I’m a loser. Got no friends to speak of that I go do things with, walk out the door and the things happy to see me are just dumb animals critters lookin’ for food and Sandy the Goat with that plaintiff “milk me” bleat. No gainful employment… the wife works, y’know. The skill sets I would be willing to share with others are not in any great demand, I don’t do chitchat well, and any conversation lasting over two minutes segues into shit that makes people highly uncomfortable, such as the skyrocketing rate of birth defects in Fallujah… couldn’t be all that depleted uranium ordnance now, could it?

I’m just plain anti social and I would have a higher tolerance for ignorance if there wasn’t so damn much of it everywhere you god damn go. A stark reality blinds me to the bright side of life when I come into contact with 99 out of 100 humans – today a Census lady came to the door – musta been 80 years old, had trouble walking and I thought how fucking sad it is that she’s forced to go after money – to collect info for the same system that used her up and said “fuck you very much”. And God help me not look at other people’s cart contents or method of payment when I go to the poison outletgrocery store…

I’m also flat out morbid. I see corpses wherever I look – The mass of busy people being all busy in the workaday world. A sense of glee comes over me when I see a new vacancy in a strip mall, another house up for sale with tall grass in the yard, and my absolute favorite – an obviously abandoned new construction project. Bad economic forecasts make me happy – I hear the death rattle of our screwed up culture in Green Speak and political discourse. I’ve tried to envision an owner of a jet ski who grows their own food; show me a new Cadillac owner and I’ll show you someone who starves when the food trucks stop rolling into the supermarkets.

I could go on forever – it’s an ugly shitty world out there so don’t find fault with me for wanting to listen to birdsong while I spread compost on the asparagus bed here on the ol’ homestead. Forgive me for being intolerant of your lactose intolerance and cluelessness about factory farm dairy products if you’re not milking goats twice a day. My life is my fault – there’s six different kinds of animal shit tracked into the kitchen every day – if you drop the toast it’s now chicken food – no two second rule applies in our house. But I’d say home is where the chickens run free – anything else is just four walls.

So I ain’t got jack, have no desire for wealth or social acceptability, and my greatest achievement is shitting in a bucket and making a mud stove. My lack of all normal ambition knows no bounds. I am truly a wretched specimen of all things civilized – a loser by any standard of decency. I am 40 acres without the mule and somehow quite satisfied with the milkweed fluff sackcloth bed I’ve made to lay in. People can think what they want… but they better not think about diggin’ my potatoes.

Best to ya, trolls and voles.</rant>

18 Responses to “Loser”

  1. Mountain rifleman says:

    Good stuff, pard. You’ll do to ride the river.

    Mountain rifleman

  2. Fuck those assholes.
    keep on with what yer doing and start posting more often. Like I care about goat shit being on the floor. You have the right attitude and are absolutely spot on about the idiots and their Cadillacs.
    They don’t know what is coming and fuck them.

    You seriously remind me of my long dead mothers side of the family that are still down south.
    I know I don’t have to worry about them, they haven’t changed in eighty years except for using tractors.
    They still eat the same way and still have gardens and can their produce and if something bad happens to a neighbor, there is fried chicken, potato salad and such on their doorstep in a heartbeat.

    Don’t let some Ahole on the internet get ya down.

  3. jB says:


    I’m supposed to be doing my taxes. I take a break and get caught up in something else. Go figure.

    Sometimes when I’m driving home from my dilbert like job I like to chill by listening to a CD, David Byrne’s Rei Momo. Pretty strange shit. Think Talking Heads meets Brazil ’66. Anyways, the more I hear track 9, “Marching Through the Wilderness (Charanga)” , I think of the comrade.

    In the following link, second album from the bottom. Last song listed in that view, Marching Through the Wilderness. Don’t follow the lyrics too closely. Mr. Byrne likes to paint pictures and evoke moods than really say something. Like I said, weird shit. Can’t help you with the Portuguese part but it’s my favorite part of the song.


    Lyrics here:


  4. Mayberry says:

    Playing with trolls can be great sport now and then, but it does get pretty old, pretty fast. Trolls are everywhere though, I got more than my fair share. And ya know, I converted a couple of ‘em! HA! But trolls mostly are a symptom of the greater ills in Amerika. By spewing the sewage they do, they demonstrate the herd mentality that government schools have instilled in them. The very thought of Individual Liberty sends them into spasms. Anyone who doesn’t quite fit in their societal mold is instantly attacked and demonized, because they fear those who can think for themselves, they lacking such ability.

    Oh, by the way, you should see it down here! We got four empty car dealerships, several abandoned construction projects, crumbling roads and infrastructure, two brand new Ace Hardware stores closed down for good, lots of empty retail space, and a block down the street from me there’s now 1/2 dozen chickens in somebody’s formerly manicured suburban front yard. The only new business I’ve seen is a place selling repo cars dirt cheap. And business is boomin’ at the pawn shops. Now if you’ll ‘scuse me, I gotta scrape the goat shit outta my boots….

  5. tired john says:

    Well Comrade, at least you have company.

    I’ll join you in the international society of pathetic losers. since I spent most of this week knitting my own socks, from wool from my own sheep and working in my machine shop rebuilding a couple of small engines for some gardening equipment I got free for the hauling. I have been busy planting seeds I saved from previous years and I’m working on improvements to the gravity flow water system. One of the local plywood mills is paying the workers in over-run production, so I got a deal (Cash – no checks or credit cards) that you wouldn’t believe on plywood for the new hay barn. For the first time ever, I will have produced enough manure and compost that I will not need to go elsewhere for soil amendments.

    I think back to the times I was a kid and I saw other kids whose mom’s patched their clothes, or who wore “Home Made” clothes. Or, the farm kids who had to eat Roast Beef on Whole Wheat sandwiches made with homemade bread while those of us who were not such pathetic losers got school lunch of Mac and Cheese or Turkey ala Glop on white bread.

    How much smarter us city kids were getting to watch movies and spend hours in front of the TV set while our hillbilly acquaintances had to waste so much time learning manual skills from Mom and Dad. Being an arrogant jerk was such a handy and important skill, and I had such a high standing amongst my friends by being just a real first class prick.

    I’m not sure when I went from being such a fine “store bought asshole” winner of a person, to being the lowly begger in homemade duds that walks down to the mail box instead of riding my fine new financed four wheeler, but sure enough I have fallen far enough to join the low of the low. Here I am with my heat and cooking stove in the living room of all places, and it is made by the most pitiful of folks, “The Amish”. Among those folks I respect are poor devils who hope to heat with contrivances mad with mud, and those that expect to maintain health by spending time working in the dirt.

    There is one thing I know for sure. Some folks say you can’t take it with you, but I believe you can if your a loser. Some folks keep their wealth in their pocket, but a loser keeps it in his head.

    Keep the faith my friend,

    tired john

  6. Frank Black says:

    Ah, dear Comrade. It is times like this that I wish Missouri and New York were closer.

  7. onedog says:

    damn, I could have written parts of that. means a lot to know there are other people more like me than like them

  8. comrade simba says:

    Hey Frank… long time no see! Glad you popped in!

    Tired John… “store bought assholes” – I think I’ll use that line. Perfect description of McPeople in SUVs.

    Jim – can’t thank you enough for that song. Honored to be thought of as track 9. I always dug the Talking Heads – “Life During Wartime” ought to be the doomer’s theme song – this ain’t no party, this ain’t no disco, this ain’t mo foolin’ around”

    Trolls are just a minor annoyance – goes with the territory. I just needed some get this off my chest, as in here’s how much I could care less about fitting in and being liked by “store bought assholes”. Thanks tired john for that one! Attaboy for knitting socks… I have about a hundred pairs stashed for doom, Socks are more important than most folks realize.

  9. jB says:


    Ain’t the same old folky shit. Huh?

    I’m just going to troll for a while. Keep throwing out those crazy assed ideas. Ok?


    I iind of have a sense of what it means and I sure like hearing it:
    Soy el galan de las penas
    Sin compasion


    tired John, point taken – again.


    To fucking sense


  10. michael says:

    I’m just a crazy dude myself. My kids will tell you that if you ask them. But my son always knows I have food in case he is hungry. He always knows my water is sweet and clean. He always knows he can leave his Pit Bull here while he goes off tromping around the place. He knows we have almost 3000 acres and he has walked most of it in the last couple of weeks. We worked like dogs to buy this land. We bore with things a modern sissy couldn’t believe. But we got it. And we have the honor of God to go along with it. Nice combination.

    I too get a grand feeling of satisfaction when something out in society (we call it skag) fails. Just makes my old heart go pitty-pat real good. I wish no success on skag. Let them suffocate in their own vomit. As to being bothered, well, don’t make THAT mistake what ever you do. I don’t care much for folks disturbing me at my normal routine, which is loafing. Garden will soon disturb my peace but it is a good kind of disturbance. Lots of food production. Good for earthly problems. To hell with the powers that be if we have enough food to outlast their onslaught. And outlast them I do intend. I will piss on their graves if given the opportunity. Yessir. I will become a bonafide grave pisser at the slightest provocation.

    You live in Missouri and that is fine. If you have a yen to move to the hills of southern Indiana give me a post. Your cantankerous ass would fit right in. You’d be right at home.


  11. Wes says:

    I usually quietly enjoy each blog post comrade. It’s the rare occasion when this loser gets to feel “normal.”

    Usually I feel I must remain respectfully quiet when relatives refuse my “chicken butt eggs” and bury my disdain for the people who prefer to embrace ignorance blissfully. I cheer oil futures not professional athletes. I eat dandelions while the neighbors spray them with herbicides.

    I listen to the truth sung by the Spring Peepers. I think I’ll go outside for an encore.

  12. Treesong says:

    Great post and oh how wonderful it is to watch what passes for “normal” crumble in its own filth. Screw the people who keep trying the same routine and expect different results.

  13. Charlie says:

    You know, Comrade, I wish you’d just tell us what you really think…
    F-the System, I work around and deal with so many hard-working, down to earth farm-type people everyday, I have a hard time just going into a “Place-Of’Business” anymore. I walk around with only 4-5 types of fesces or various animal fluids on my boots everyday, but get looked down on by soooo many usless eaters, it pisses me off to the point of just not givin’ a shit anymore. I’m just “closin’-in” everything, I rather talk to my cows/calves/chickens than I would try to have a conversation with an “educated” person…..But hey, pastures are-a-greenin’, hens are-a-layin’, and spring is mere days away..sorta….

  14. cody says:

    hey don’t let those trolls get to you, in about ten years those guys will be huddled in the dark, starving, wishing they could be you.

    BTW, I myself am trying to become a “pathetic loser” myself. I recently inherited my grandma’s house w/ 3 acres of land, and I have big plans for it. compost piles, gardens, dwarf fruit trees, hutches for meat rabbits, Hell maybe I could even squeeze in a friggin goat.

  15. risa b says:

    Sir, it is said they laughed at Noah. I salute you.

  16. alderlily says:

    This is my third comment attempt on this post; must be doing something wrong and trying a different browser now. After typing it in twice, it’s like ‘oh, shit, who cares anyway?’ so, like a couple other folks already said, thanks for rants and writing. . . it’s nice not to feel like the only one.

  17. comrade simba says:

    alderlily – sorry about that… technology isn’t perfect. I can’t count how many posts have disappeared int the ether over the years. I got into the habit of copying before I hit “post” on anything more than a few lines.

  18. gdog says:

    comrade, re: “skyrocketing rate of birth defects in Fallujah”

    ever done an image search on “birth defects depleted uranium”? if not, you may want to skip it. these are absolutely the single most harrowing, bizarre, and nauseating images I have ever seen in my life. and to think I fund these despicable crime against humanity… ah, it’s great to live in a christian-y nation.